Put Your Left Foot In

 

    Morning should be quiet and peaceful and should not include hunting for one's own shoes that have disappeared overnight.  It amazes that I can take both shoes off in one location and yet, without fail, the pair separates sometime during the night when nobody is watching.   While hopping though the house this morning, wearing only one black leather boot, I mined for the missing mate in the closet, under the bed and in my daughter's room.  It's sad to report that I never found the other boot, but I did find a small collection of left footed shoes under my couch.   This begs the question, "Why?" and even "How?"  Why would anyone have a need for one shoe only and what would be the reason for a small collection of shoes, for the left foot only, to gather under my couch!?!  After turning the house upside down and slowly slipping into madness, I concluded that we had a one legged shoe thief who liked my shoes, but needed only one from a each set.  It's either that or there is a crazy game of Hokey Pokey going on after I fall asleep each night. 
    I left word for my daughter to please locate the missing shoes and oddly, without fail, she matched all the shoes and left them in my room.  She has an uncanny ability to find lost things and restores sanity to my world.  

    It is not uncommon for items to come up missing in my house.  It is usually after a complete meltdown on my part that the items magically reappear.  It is odd to me that a 10 gallon stock pot or a plunger can mysteriously vanish with nobody knowledgeable as to who removed the items from the house.  I've learned not to get too attached to material things as who knows when they will suddenly come up missing.  They normally return, but not until I've moved a few steps closer to madness. To this day, I'm still missing some right footed shoes, a very special wine opener, a three legged cat and a mop that must have walked right out the door.   

 Thanks to Ben Simo for the great shoe pic.  http://BenSimo.QualityFrog.com/
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Oddly, my concern over left footed thieves could be valid as I ran across this recent article...

Unfashionable Thieves Make Off With 50 Oversized Right-Footed Shoes

By Coburn Palmer Thu., Dec. 6 2012 at 1:50 PM
SFWeekly Blogs

If the shoe fits...

We're not kidding when we tell you that a San Francisco shoe store had some $10,000 worth of right-footed plus-sized shoes stolen Monday night.

Perhaps it was the work of some right-footed peg-leg pirates?

According to Johanna Nilsson, a spokeswoman for LLXLLQ (AKA: really large shoes for women), she parked her car near 19th and Valencia streets, leaving a suitcase of 50 right-footed shoe samples in her trunk. When she came back, the shoes -- and incidentally, her Christmas spirit -- were long gone.

The Palo Alto-based online store, which specializes in oversized Italian shoes, is now hoping that a good Samaritan who appreciates shoes will find the footwear and return it.

Yes, there's a reward -- no questions asked. Anyone who returns all 50 shoes can get either a free pair of oversized footwear (one right and one left shoe), or $150 Visa gift card. If you know what happened to the shoes, call Nilsson at (650) 516-7463.

Perhaps we shouldn't be surprised if now there's a sudden rash of left-footed shoe thefts around town.