Appliance Envy

Wonders never cease.  I took my kids with me to buy a new washing machine yesterday.  Explain to me how children who can't pick their clothes up off the floor suddenly know the difference in a front loader and the old standard $400 “Drop your clothes in the tub” washer.  Their eyes twinkled as they looked at the colored models of top of the line, high efficiency washers and dryers. They began discussing cubic feet, spin speeds and low suds options like they woke up this morning and all of this was suddenly important to them. They discussed which friend's parents had machines with steam options, L.E.D. lighting, and something called Fan Fresh.  It was apparent that my children were suffering from appliance envy.   I walked them over to a $300, top loading, plain Jane washer just to see their reaction.  They began to wring their hands and beads of sweat formed at their temples like little appliance addicts.  I reminded them that a good river stone and flowing water can produce the same results.  They were insulted, shocked even, that I would suggest such.  I’m certain it is more of a “Keeping  up with the Jones” phenomenon rather than a sudden interest in clean laundry and energy conservation.  They’re fooling no-one.    I picked out an average Extra Large Capacity washer and as I could have predicted, it wasn't available for two weeks.  Want to guess which ones could be picked up that day?  Of course, only the ones that resemble the space shuttle and have a similar price tag.  So tonight, I will stand in front of my new appliances and hopefully select buttons that will lead to clean clothes and not launch inter-galactic rockets from my home.  My kids should be so pleased.